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Marriage Requires Team Work

When I was a young adult, I met a married couple named Tom and Nancy. After spending some time with Tom and Nancy, you could see that they had a great marriage. There was a reason Tom and Nancy had a great marriage. They understood something that most couples don’t. They understood that marriage requires teamwork.

As a full-time college pastor, Tom could have just allowed his wife to do all the housework and support his career. But Tom was also concerned about his wife’s development. Once a week we would watch the kids so his wife could teach a math class at a local community college. It was just one of the many things Tom did to be in a team relationship with his wife.

Now let me share with you the key to building a successful wedding team. It’s a simple concept, but remember it takes hard work. Now that’s the key to building a successful wedding team. The key is to understand and approve of each other’s goals in life.

Maybe one of your wife’s goals is to write a book. A wise husband would go out of his way to encourage his wife and help his wife write her book. Maybe you can watch the kids for four hours on Saturdays so your wife has time to write uninterrupted.

Now let me share with you a simple process to help you and your spouse understand and approve of each other’s goals. Then you will know how to work as a team. Remember that a successful marriage requires teamwork.

1. I encourage each individual to write down seven goals for the year.

I encourage people to write goals for their spiritual development. As a Christian, my current goal for spiritual development is to pray for half an hour a day and memorize the book of Philippians for a half hour a day. I also encourage people to write down goals for their family, business, professional pursuits, and personal development.

2. Share and evaluate your goals together as a married couple.

Together, help each other decide if each other’s goals are realistic or unrealistic. Should we achieve this goal this year or wait until another time? What are the most important goals we need to accomplish this year? Do we have the time, money and energy to achieve the goals?

3. Decide how to help each other achieve your goals.

This is the most important part of learning to work in a team. Brainstorm together how you can help each other achieve your goals. As you put this into action, you will find yourself in an exciting team relationship with your spouse. Each couple will have a different list depending on their needs.

My wife does a lot of things to work as a team with me. Due to our current financial situation, we only have one car. My wife often goes out of her way to drive me to Barnes and Nobles. She knows the calm atmosphere of the cafe, I can do more work. It’s just one of the many things she does.

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